Frolic on 72nd Street

“If my friends could see me now,” (from the musical, Sweet Charity) is my theme song for that most charming season, autumn. When the skies above New York City, morph into a spectacular golden grey, overwhelming humidity travels south.

My cardigans and I have always reveled in lightly chilled winds. Not only is New York is painted in dynamic hues of red and orange, but the city evokes a more romantic facade.

In the mystical land, Norah Ephron romantic comedies, a new kind of love was igniting. ” Let’s go see the beautiful fall foliage today, said my one of my best gay buddies. With that statement, he gathered up the troops for a field trip to Central Park. One troop was running fashionably late, which kept us gays, quite anxious.

As we chatted it up in the background of a friend’s cozy, Upper West Side apartment, the buzzer sounded. “Finally,” we all shouted. I was curious to meet this new troop.

The door opened dramatically. There he stood, Noah. He traveled all the way, crosstown just to see foliage with us. I took a gulp. “Hello, Noah, I thought to myself. My palms were sweating and caterpillars transformed into butterflies with his very appearance.

He had a classic intellectual look. With short dark hair, black-frame glasses and a fashionable black sweater, he was physically a charmer. I extended my hand to introduce myself. He turned his head, avoiding eye contact with me. The butterflies fell from the sky and returned to their cocoon. “Shit, he knows I am interested and gave me the cold shoulder,” I thought to myself.

I dusted the disappointment from my shoulders and we headed toward Central Park. The city was dusting itself from the reminients of a brutal summer. It was beaming with a renewed sense of self.

Even though, I felt slightly rejected by Noah, I decided to get to know him better. This time, I played calm and collected, strolling with the troops around the Jacqueline Kennedy Onasis Reservoir. We made good conversation, but the eye contact was perpetually non-existent.

” Gee, where is all the foliage?” cried one of the troops. Indeed the park was barely painted in orange and red. Miraculously, there was one tree toward Fifth Avenue, which drenched in red leaves. We all took pictures. “Mission accomplished, let’s go have a drink, boy,” I declared. Over margaritas and tacos, I wanted to uncover the mystery of Noah.

Even after a few frosty adult beverages, Noah turned his head, anytime we made eye contact. “Oh I hate the head turn, oy to the vey,” said a disappointed, I.

The troops decided they wanted to see a film at the local IMAX. ” Hey guys, I have a hard time at movie theaters, they make me sleepy. I am going back to my apartment,” said I.

With that I gave the troops a hug, goodbye. I reached over to give Noah a hug. ” Nice to meet you,” he said. “Thanks you too, said I. He kept an emotionless exterior and finally made direct eye contact.

“I think you’re absolutely adorable,” said Noah. The butterflies once again rose from cocoons. My brain swung to the sounds of Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong, singing, “Let’s call the whole thing off,” while orange leaves fell from the sky. “That means he’s into you,” whispered my friend into my perky ear.

“Back at ya,” I told Noah. I walked away. Then I thought to myself, “shit I walked away, rather than having the balls to ask him out on a proper date.” Rather, than dwelling on my lack of action, I utilized the experience to always seize the moment. With that said, I shall write the next fellow I fall for, a most wonderful poem. Who could resist a witty poem filled with romance?

Lullaby of Chinatown

Within the perimeters of Canal & Bowery, exists a country within a city. In the shadow of neon signs flashing Cantonese and Mandarin, are many treasured wonders.

Exotic fruit, which have the appearance of quirky, avant-garde art, delights all senses. The sweet scent of miniature pancakes infuses with escaped fish from the sea. Chinese fans, ceramic dragons and Buddha’s, provide a much-needed kitsch.

In the midst of Chinatown’s charm, four New Yorkers embarked on an odyssey. Firstly, I must take the flying DeLorean to last year (hello, Back to the Future reference). Fasten your seat belts, folks. Please be aware of the exit row. Here we go, its lift off time.

It happened last year on the rooftop of a quaint building, in close proximity to Washington Square Park. Yours truly and some of my people waited in anticipation for one magnificent sight. That glorious Kodak moment was in the form of fireworks. Hello, Fourth of July, said I. As the darkness embedded Greenwich Village, the anticipation built.

Boom, boom, boom went the fireworks. With great dramatic momentum, our eyes searched the night sky for those beloved-flashing lights over the nearby Hudson. The sound effects persisted, but the fire works were nowhere to be seen. I looked at my friends in puzzlement. “Where are the fireworks? They’re supposed to be visible from this vantage point, aren’t they? asked I.

We waited a bit longer. Still the imposing apartment buildings of the West Village shielded us from that most Fourth of July tradition. Instead of feeling disappointed, we watched the fireworks on television. It was quite lovely, but not the same sensation (as seeing them in person).

A few weeks later, I strolled the Upper West Side. While walking toward the 72nd Street subway, I heard a familiar, boom sound. I peered into the night sky over Broadway. Fireworks dominated the ornate Upper West Side sky. This was in celebration of Bastille Day (French independence day). The sight was quite magnificent. I declared, “vive la France.” My desire to see fireworks on the Fourth of July only intensified.

Let’s take the DeLorean back to this year. While my gal pals and I didn’t see the candy hued lights over Manhattan, last year, we made it a mission to actually see them this year.

In the depth of an empty Chinatown, we set out on foot to see the glorious show. Even as experienced New York walkers, we were baffled on where to see the show, which was on the East River (this year). We took a side street down and as the Manhattan Bridge appeared, our mission had been accomplished.

At last, we found the perfect vantage once we reached the East River’s Edge. “This is it, we’ll finally see the show,” I declared. Hoping that nobody extraordinarily tall would hover in front of me, I waited in anticipation. Then that familiar boom was heard. The fireworks commenced. They lit up the sky from the near-by Brooklyn Bridge. “Oh, aw, wow,” said the onlookers.

I too was in awe of the sparkly sky. At that moment, I appreciated seeing the show in living flesh. It would become one of my all time favorite New York memories. I was so very impressed with the pomp and pageantry of great American tradition.

Afterwards, we topped off the night, Lower East Side style. As wine was sipped, we thanked our lucky stars for a most memorable Fourth of July.

The Introverted Fellow

On evenings spent at home, I switch from fancy French films with lavish subtitles and 80’s teen flicks to quirkier viewing. Before journeying into the isle of sleep, I sometimes enjoy watching old Oscar acceptance speeches on YouTube.

The raw emotions, theatrics and joyful demeanor of the winners’ tugs at the heart strings each time. While I revel and sometimes giggle at the sassy acceptance speeches of Cher & Barbara Streisand (had to give a shout out to the gay icons), I always wondered, “gee how the heck do you get up on stage and pretend not too morph into a big ball of anxiety?”

I never fancied pursing a career as an actor. It always seemed grueling to go on a stage and act. Little did I know, that eventually, I too would have to perform the greatest monologues on life’s stage.

I am an extrovert, who loves people. However, I was also hiding a very little known fact. Drum roll please, I had social anxiety. In new situations and crowded places, where I had to socialize, a case of nervous jitters would appear.

Like any proper lad would do, I indulged on a refreshing glass of whisky too loosen up. Alas, it didn’t work. By the end of the party, I would survive, make a witty joke and have memories of a great evening out, though the social anxiety persisted.

On the first big snow of the New York winter season, I woke up excitedly. It was my friend’s birthday in Harlem and the winter sky was calming. I walked out of my modest Harlem apartment with a beautiful bottle of champagne to celebrate. I was then struck by anxiety quickly, as the snow fell gracefully into black pea coat.

“Oh no new people, lots of single guys, what do I do? What do I talk about?” said I. Passing the snow covered hills of St. Nicholas Park and Harlem’s very elegant architectural gems, the fear nearly crippled me. Finally, I arrived at my friend’s apartment. I rinsed the snow from my dark curls and rode the elevator up.

Channeling Barbara Streisand’s Oscar speech was monumental. She was just her witty self on stage. I too must be my witty, quirky self and strut my stuff at this party,” said I. The negative thoughts fled like snowbirds heading south for the winter. “Think Funny Girl,” I did and evolved from a bag full of social anxiety to a fabulous grand dame of the ball.

I danced to 80’s music, made new friends and had frosty adult beverages to commemorate the special day. Then as Duran Duran’s Hungry like a wolf echoed throughout the apartment, the gays arrived. My face turned tomato red. They were really cute. The apartment’s heat levels escalated to inferno levels.

“Be quirky, be funny, but most of all have fun, cause everyone poops and there’s nothing to be intimidated by,” said I (speaking internally). I took a generous gulp of champagne and mingled with the boys. Not a bit of nervousness penetrated through my jolly exterior. By the end of the soiree, I made plenty of new friends and had a splendid time.

Social anxiety reared its unfashionable frock many times after that. With wit, I said the hell with and learned to revel in every campy moment. When one can’t conquer a room full of revelers, pronouncing “hello, gorgeous” would win over friends and make even the stiffest personality into a loveable one.

Grey in the Face

Waking up in London felt especially thrilling at seventeen. I was mesmerized by everything. The underground’s escalators, which practically reached the heavens, palaces, double decker buses, street fashion, parks of greenery and the fragrance of cigarettes filling the ancient sidewalks.

I was truly in love. As a kid from Riverside, California, this was an especially significant treat. Going from vastness of freeways and strip malls to British cultural institutions, would make any sad bloke smile.

On one particular trip to London, with my mom I would wake up and take strolls along Euston Road. It’s a street, which isn’t particularly lovely, just a place to catch the train. Since it was London, I reveled in the ordinary pavement with extraordinary history.

On my first walk in the old capital, I came back to our hotel room and washed my face. Grey poured from my face. “This is quite peculiar. “Why is their grey pouring from my face? “I asked myself. I told my mom. “I’ve been blowing my nose and grey has been coming out, “she said, appearing quite annoyed.

I grinned rather than falling into a state of worrying. The grey happenstance delighted me. It meant I was in London. That fact was truly thrilling. Each day, I washed my face the same occurrence continued.

By the time, I returned home to the States, grey no longer filled my sink. I was very sad. Secretly, I longed to still have my tootsies planted on British soil.

Years later, I returned to London. I was still a visitor, but the love affair was more romantic than Love Actually, Notting Hill & Bridget Jones’ Diary combined.

 

 

 

 

Across The East River

Across the East River from glamorous Manhattan, lies the borough’s hip and stylish counterpart, Brooklyn. Within Carroll Gardens, one of Brooklyn’s most charming neighborhoods lived a lawyer. He was gay, single, late thirties, and lived in a most charming Brownstone. One icy Sunday night, he logged into okcupid and connected with a creative type across the East River.

In the upper, upper Upper West Side of Manhattan (Harlem), lived a thirty-something, gay, singleton (yours truly). He resided in a modest walk-up.

In a shocking state of events, he had also logged into okcupid on that icy Sunday night. Through messages about a common love of Japan, high neurosis level and coffee, Brooklyn decided to embark on a journey to meet Manhattan.

While waiting in the midst of the East Village’s St. Patrick’s Day mayhem, Manhattan locked eyes with Brooklyn. “Wow, he’s has that cute, intellectual, nerdy, yet easy-going vibe about him, thought Manhattan to himself.

After enjoying wine, and an authentic Thai dinner, Brooklyn needed to head to a jazz concert in Midtown. However, Manhattan couldn’t resist Brooklyn’s charms and insisted on going to a passé gay bar in Chelsea instead. Brooklyn caved in.

In a classic gay bar with videos of drag queens, a dancing Donald Duck, and David Bowie playing in the background, Brooklyn interlocked with Manhattan through a kiss.

A week later, Manhattan made the trek to Carroll Gardens. It was an easy ride, since he had been visiting old friends in (semi) nearby, Greenpoint.

At the corner of Union & Smith, the irresistible eye contact persisted. Margaritas were drunk, childhood stories exchanged and a kiss over guacamole, commenced.

While strolling along Carroll Garden’s immaculate brownstone blocks, Manhattan had to return home. With one faithful swipe at the Carroll Street station, Manhattan waived “so long to Brooklyn” at the other end of the turnstile.

Like something out of Nora Eprhon flick (When Harry Met Sally), Brooklyn swiped his unlimited metro card, dashed to Manhattan and gave him another very long, passionate kiss.

The G train arrived. With the wind from the train blowing across the station, Manhattan could barely walk from the highs of romance. He managed to step into the allusive subway train, which doesn’t actually go into the city.

After transferring to the A, then to an Uptown 3, Manhattan came to an inevitable realization. “Shit, Brooklyn is far from Harlem,” said our lovebird, who had just been struck by (ok) cupid’s arrow. Regardless, of distance, the romantic prospects were simply thrilling.

As time flew in a New York minute, Brooklyn and Manhattan texted each other. There were novel worthy texts, naturally. However, the distance factor persisted.

Brooklyn stepped foot in the city for work, only. While, Manhattan adored Brooklyn and his very lovely Carroll Gardens flat, but it was a long trek. Strangely, our gay superheroes were in a long distance relationship within New York City.

Winter faded to spring, though the romance blossomed slowly. Then the text messages grew tiresome, Manhattan just wanted to go to brunch with his friends and partake in bottomless mimosas. He did just that. In great spontaneity, Brooklyn crossed the mighty East River and met Manhattan for a sandwich.

On fourteenth and Seventh Ave, two familiar lips locked once again. This time, Manhattan headed uptown without an encore, kissing performance on the subway platform.

Once, he arrived at his modest walk-up apartment, he had some Pringles and called it a night. Who needs romance when potato chips await? Said Manhattan.

Brooklyn and Manhattan continued to live a world away from each other. However, with the magic of bridges, the two could find each other again, with a side of guacamole, of course.

 

Hello, Polar Bear

EXT: New York City, post Polar vortex

The skies were a crisp and lovely shade of blue. Trench coats, pea coats and scarves retreated to their spring/summer home, the closet. Tulips and roses bloomed across the city. From Midtown East to Greenwich Village, the blossoming flowers re-created the charm of an English garden. However, post Polar vortex New York was more hot Tottie friendly than conducive to frozen margarita madness. A bit of cold air still lingered.

For this polar bear at heart, the cold weather was splendid. I paraded around the East Village in my pea coat and fancy sweaters. Then one weekend, this urban polar bear felt a strange sensation. A drop fell from my forehead and into the sidewalk along a merry festival of historic West Village brownstones. I gazed into the sun. “Shit, it does finally feel like spring. It’s hot,” said I, whipping the sweat from my brow.

I made the best out of my sweaty scenario and ventured into the Hudson’s waterfront. The breeze from the river was quite refreshing.

While walking along, everyone seemed delighted. The sidewalks were bustling and not one remnant of winter could be felt. As I crossed the West Side highway into Christopher Street Pier, I looked around there were shirtless gays everywhere. “Ok, maybe spring isn’t too bad?”

The next day, the heat intensified. Like most New Yorkers, I cooled down with a mimosa at brunch. While sitting at a charming restaurant with my friend, Jennie, she suggested we venture into a most cliché of scenarios. If you guessed Central Park, than congrats you know Manhattan quite well.

“Why don’t we go sit in the grass?” asked Jennie. “I don’t wanna sit in grass. My tuckus will get green and I just don’t want to get my shoes dirty, said I.

“Oh common, said Jennie, as she sat amongst the other park dwellers. I continued to stand. Giving a smirk, I grew weary of standing and finally caved in. As my tuckus hit the green and wet grass, I gave out a whine. “Geez, I don’t get sitting in the grass. I mean, I am not a wilderness kind of guy, said I.

Jennie giggled and replied, “Look around, you don’t exactly live in the country.” I smiled and indulged in some people watching. Typically, I enjoyed New York parks on a bench, but the grass wasn’t so bad. That was my idea of roughing it and oddly enough, it was enjoyable.

The next day, springtime heat disappeared. With a sudden shock, the aftermath of the Polar vortex returned. It was a happy spring, indeed. My pea coats returned from their closeted confides, after a weekend away. It even snowed, briefly. I enjoyed a bit of winter, since the roar of summer was en route.

The Witty Wordsmith

New York, late winter, the sky is an intense shade of grey. The trees remained bare of any lively bright leaves. In the midst of the eerie grey, a remarkable bit of sunshine played peek-a-boo behind a rainy cloud.

On such an idyllic winter’s day, I set off on foot for St. Nicholas Park in Harlem. It’s a most wonderful park, which fades into hilly fields of green. Regardless of the cold, I’ve always adored sitting on a park bench and reading a good book. Quality time with a book is my ideal form of therapy. I fade into a character’s shoes and forget any of the day troubles.

On one riveting expedition, I sought a most wonderful park bench. As, I picked a perfect little spot for literary madness, the cold winds penetrated through my layers, and pea coat.

For once in my life, I shivered. The goose bumps on my arm grew more sensitive. At that point, I had to look elsewhere for a romantic date with my used book from the Strand bookstore.

I wandered through Harlem’s Hamilton’s Heights neighborhood. It’s the perfect backdrop for any quirky film (Wes Anderson’s Royal Tenenbaums was filmed there). The brownstones are eccentric yet sophisticated characters in their own right.

The hills have provided an escape from the quintessentially Manhattan painting. Bay windows, dramatic stoops and old world charm could inspire poets, painters and playwrights of life to create a proper work of art.

While heading up the hill toward Broadway, I was craving a hot chocolate from the Chipped Cup (my favorite coffee shop, uptown). On that pleasantly quiet Sunday, everyone had the same idea.

The quaint coffee shop was filled with patrons. I was disappointed, since I just wanted was to read a good book. So, I headed back down to 145 street.

To my disappointed, Dunkin Donuts was also filled to the brim with people. I didn’t want to go back to my apartment, since I was really craving a coffee shop. Instead of giving up hope, I took an unexpected turn.

The Eighth avenue subway provided the ears with a classic sound, which only a raspy record player could rival. I found my reading spot, a seat on the subway platform. Even though, the subway has many distractions, I’ve always found it an easy place to concentrate on a book there.

When the A train arrived, I boarded it merrily. I even found a seat. However, distraction found me. “Why don’t you put a chip in me, so you know where I am at all times, said a girlfriend to an equally angry boyfriend. They fought. They whole train watched. Trying to hold back laughter, I tried very hard to not loose concentration on my book.

The arguing heightened into theatrical satire. “Fuck it, I can’t think with this racket going on. At least, there aren’t break-dancers on this train, ” said I. “Showtime,” yelled a boy with a boom box.” Break-dancers with a giant boom box appeared from the blue to everyone’s annoyance.

My eyes didn’t leave my book. Anyhow, my brain was completely distracted. I made it to West 4th Street. Randomly, I decided a cannoli would be amazing.

So, I boarded the F train to Second Avenue and ended up in the East Village. I headed up First Avenue and into the old world charm of Veniero’s (legendary dessert restaurant in the East Village). I ordered a cannoli and opted for a cappuccino rather than a hot chocolate.

I took out my book and found a swell place to concentrate. It only took a long walk, two trains and another somewhat long walk to find my literary Zen. Regardless, my literary Zen was a whole lot better with a delicious cannoli accompanying it.

Illuminate Yourself With A bright Red Tie

The immense fog of San Francisco married the flurries of Alaska. Afterwards, they traveled east to New York for a dream honeymoon. They made their presence known, engulfing the city’s tenement masterpieces into a sea of grey.

It was a sight to wake up to. While, a part of me, wanted to order food from seamless web, watch endless documentaries ranging from fashion photography to the art of sushi making and (just plain) hibernate, the Indiana Jones in me longed for an adventure.

Rather, than having wanderlust about the lost arc or being chased by a giant rock, I got all dolled up. I placed by tortoise shell glasses on, which accentuated my navy blue pea coat.

Something was missing. I dug deep in the far reaches of my closet. My archaeological dig did not produce a missing link to the T-Rex family, but I did find a precious relic.

“My red tie, here you are, ” I said to myself. I tied it over my grey blue shirt and put my favorite grey cardigan on. It was more Upper West Side than Indiana Jones, but it was most fitting for adventure seeking in the city.

I gained fuel at my favorite diner on Amsterdam Ave. Afterwards; I walked up 72nd Street toward Central Park. In the midst of snow and intense grey, New York lacked color. It was the equivalent of fading into an old black and white film. The only hint of color was leaping from my fiery red tie.

The pitter pater of snow persisted. I reached the imposing apartment blocks of Fifth Avenue. Snow banks, Barney’s NY shopping bags and well-heeled ladies in fur coats created a most quintessential Upper East Side memory.

I walked toward Lexington Avenue with the intent to grab the 4/5 train downtown for an afternoon nosh (snack) and cappuccino. While craving my adrenaline rush from a coffee bean, I experienced a cinematic moment. Truman Capote referred to Lexington Ave as charmless.

Walking from the East seventies to the fifties.  Lex (which I walked on a million times or so. Lex is how we refer to it here) was actually proving to be quiet lovely. Old bookshops, cafes, mom n’ pop restaurants, pre-war buildings and side streets with imposing brownstones birthed a classically New York scene.

I saw the F train station at 63rd street. “How wonderful, I’ll take the F train to the Lower East Side,” said I. When I reached the station, it was a confusing mismatch of platforms and escalators. In my whole history in New York, I had only been lost on the subway once.

This time around, the lack of platform signs indicating uptown/downtown confused me. I was officially lost in translation and on a Queens bound F train. Rather than becoming flustered, I thought to myself ” oh this train stops in Roosevelt Island (an island in the middle of the East River), I’ll just switch over to a downtown train there.

When I stepped off the subway at Roosevelt Island, curiosity captured my heart. I saw another intense set of escalators, which were so high, I wondered if I would be dancing in a sea of clouds.

The explorer in me wanted to see a part of the city, which I had never explored before. As I leaped out of the F train station, the snow morphed into a light dusting of frost.

Roosevelt island was filled with steel and glass modern apartments. However, one sight would be the red tie to an otherwise colorless day.

My eyes met the Queens-borough Bridge. It jutted across the island. The tram moved slowly (there’s a tram which takes residents from Roosevelt to Manhattan) in the midst of the background of the Manhattan skyline.

It provided me with the holy grail of New York memories. I strolled around the island a bit and finally headed downtown. After entering the subway, I could officially say “I’ve been on Roosevelt Island.

After exiting the Second Avenue subway station, I marveled at the grey skies. The snow stopped. I walked toward a coffee shop, which had vintage rock n’ roll posters and plenty of electrical outlets (to charge my phone). While trying to resist the temptation of heading inside Katz’s, an epiphany came into my brain.

That particular day with it’s snow filled skies, Kodak worthy pictures of the Queens borough bridge & overall happy spirit, will remain one of those special nostalgic memories. “Wow, sometimes, I really am the Indiana Jones of Manhattan. If Indiana Jones wore a bunch of cardigans and wrote a blog, of course,” said I.

Ma, Where Do Teletubbies live?

When a gay boy leaps out of the closet, the doors open into a modern day Oz. There’s a yellow brick road, which leads into a most majestic land. Purple teletubbies parachute from the turquoise sky.

“Welcome to gay-landia,” sing the four loveable teletubbies. Dorothy, the tin man, lion and scarecrow skip down the yellow-brick road, passing out skittles to the newly out gay. Prince Charming rides into the hilly green terrain on unicorn.

“Hello, I am a gay prince. Marry Me,” says Prince Charming. So, he sweeps the gay off his feet. They ride toward a castle and live happily ever after.

This is the ideal painting for every gay who’s come out of the darkened closet. However, if this were actually true to life, we wouldn’t have so many sad love ballads.

As a gay boy, who loved Rent (the musical) too much, I wondered who would be the Burt to my Ernie (insert Sesame Street reference)? In non-Sesame Street language, it’s called a boyfriend.

“I see you dating a guy with an English accent. For some reason, I can see you two getting dressed up, while cooking omelets in the morning, said my high school friend, Grace. “

While she spoke, I delved into imagination land. More specifically, I saw myself in a kitchen covered in French country style wallpaper with an English chap. We laughed as we cracked eggs; fired up the stove and made gourmet omelets.

“That’s it,” I proclaimed. As I journeyed back to my high school reality, I uttered the following words, “I must meet a boy, who I can make omelets with.

It took a while to meet a boy. Growing up in a conservative town and high school, didn’t exactly equate an enormous pool of eligible bachelors. However, there were cool spots for gay boys, especially arty ones to meet.

One particular night, I went to the local indie coffee shop, Back 2 the Grind. It hosted bands, art and was a meeting place for the town’s alternative and gay crowd. While, sipping on a cappuccino, I spotted my friends.

Unexpectedly, I took a trip down the yellow brick road. He stood there, looking most ideal. Rather, than riding on a unicorn, he walked out from bustling sidewalk.

I found out we grew up close to each other, but had never met. My brown eyes met his blue eyes. My already rosy cheeks were on fire. I could explain the sensation, which followed.

“Wow, these feel like hot flashes. I remember my mom telling me about this. Wait, am I getting menopause? I naively thought to myself. “No, no men can’t menopause, (still debating this one)” I later assured myself.

There wasn’t a Dorothy, Scarecrow, Tin-Man, lion or teletubbies, who could save me. “What was going on?” I thought to myself. The electricity ran through the wires keeping my brain intact. I could hear the song, “kiss me” by Six Pence none the richer playing in my head. The sensation went from scary to enchanting.

“Wow, this is better than Oz,” I thought to myself. I cleared the sweat from my brow as I continued talking to the fellow. My friend whispered, “he’s pretty cute right?” Shaking my head “yes,” I bravely continued the conversation.

My face turned from pepto bismol pink to a cherry tomato red. The fellow did not seem too talkative and the conversation turned into blur from my nerves. Like the mighty Lion (in the Wizard of Oz), I gained some courage.

“Can, I get your number?” I asked. “Shit, I really did it,” was my initial thought. He gave me his number. I stared at it a bit before calling. Finally, I just pressed the damn number.

We talked, but he didn’t seem interested. However, we made plans, but he canceled. Eventually, I was rejected.  I am sure he couldn’t make a good omelet. I do have a special intuition about these things.

It was my first foray into the world of rejection. It was more evil than the wicked witch of the west. As time, went on I couldn’t just tap my ruby red slippers and wish it away.

Instead, I developed a thick skin. After all, I’ll always have my own private Oz. It’s that mystical land where teletubbies sing, the rain consists of brightly colored skittles and all the men can make an extraordinary omelet.

Snowy Empire

Somebody please cue to the Star Wars theme. In a galaxy not so far away, lived a lad. Like any proper New York singleton, he resided in a modest fifth floor walk-up.

One morning he glanced out his window. There was snow, snow and more snow (not unusual, but hey it’s winter). “It looks like the set of the Empire Strikes Back,” he proclaimed.  Naturally, it appeared that way, if the “Empire Strikes Back” were set in New York City. Like a courageous Luke Skywalker facing Darth Vader, he braved the elements. Successfully, he reached the subway and made it to work, in the face of another blizzard.

As expected, I am referring to yours truly and my random fascination with Star Wars. I didn’t have Chewbacca, C-3PO, Hans Solo, Yoda or Princess Lea on the voyage from Harlem to Grand Central Station. So, this is where I fast-forward the story.

While galloping around the icy sidewalks of Harlem, I thought to myself “no major blizzard (9.5 inches of snow) will keep me away from a wonderful walk. I felt triumphant, as I successfully maneuvered through the frozen canyons and icy puddles. The Star Wars theme continued to play in the radio station of my brain, ” Cardigns 95.5 FM- New York.”

Then with much disruption, radioactive transmission stopped. It finally happened, I had met my match with black ice. I flipped backwards, landing on the slippery pavement. My stuff flew alongside the perfectly appointed brownstone block.

Wait isn’t this the part, where my life flashes before my eyes? I thought in great panic. I expected to see a montage of memorable events, then the unthinkable happened. “Oh yeah, I didn’t bump my head, I landed on my tuckus,” said I, as I picked myself up slowly

The fall really hurt, but I attempted to find humor in my mishap. While walking home, I watched every step more carefully.

As the weekend approached, the Jedi did indeed return. I was enjoying the snow, immensely. Regardless of experiencing pain from the fall, I still adored the wintery weather. On the weekend, I took a journey into Central Park.

Snow fell from the sky, while blinding the eye. There were snowmen; families sledded down the powdery hills and an unexpected musical accompaniment. While there was a commercial break on Cardigans FM, I was serenaded by the sounds of a saxophone player. It made the perfect soundtrack to a most memorable New York moment.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 433 other followers